For a very long time now I have waited for a call to come in asking for assistance in repairing a clock that has suffered party damage in the abscence of parental law. Today it happened. These two are responsible for it. I cannot name them – on these types of black operations we dont use names.
The official story is that they were sipping at a half of shandy while discussing the merits of charity work when they noticed a kitten trapped behind the clock. There was no time to waste as the cat could also have been hungry as well as trapped. Obviously the clock needed hacking into with a fire axe and then a good kicking.
In normal circumstances it would be fair to predict a really really good hard bollocking accompanied by various agressive sanctions on personal freedom and finances. That is unless you can get some idiot to come out on bank holiday Sunday, not charge you a fortune and enter into the conspiracy with you. It would also be a bonus if the same person could get the clock running and actually leave the clock better working order than before it was abused by the reckless actions of a kitten.
All part of the service and a landmark day for me. Thanks guys.